Tag Archives: Politics

A Truly LaMalfable Situation

We’re getting pretty badly LaMalfa’d up here in this rural corner of California. If you don’t know what it means to be LaMalfa’d, then you may not be from around these parts; you may not be represented in Congress by people like our own Dougie LaMalfa, a none-too-bright wealthy heir to a big rice farm out in Richvale.

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We Oughta Be Ashamed Of Ourselves

LaMalfa fits with that company right down to his hat and his boots.

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Rainy Days & Blowhards

The Pineapple Express, come to find out, is not just some kind of ganja. It’s actually a real atmospheric phenomenon that brews up around Hawaii and then shoots off to California to soak the crap out of us.

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I see your Petraeus Affair, and I raise you a Reynolds Affair.

…it got us at the Synthesis thinking about sexual affairs in history-where does the Petraeus affair rank in most scandalous affairs in US history? Without a doubt, the Reynolds Affair takes the cake.

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The Long, Hard Slog

By Bob Howard I’m writing this on the eve of the Presidential election. By the time you read it, we will, if all goes well, know who the Commander in Chief is going to be for the next four years – either Mitt Romney will have unseated the sitting President, or Barak Obama will have […]

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Remember, Remember…

But any excuse, or no excuse at all, is enough to get my inner firebug tittering.

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Love ‘Em Or Make ‘Em Leave?

They travel on the homeless highway from Seattle to Portland to San Francisco, and now Chico is on that stop.

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Tricky Mitt

Two years of his tax returns are missing from the public eye, which just leads to speculation on what kind of cookie jar his fingers were in.

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Freedoms so basic we forget that people fought and died for them

I’m supposed to meet a man named Frank, at the Donut Nook on East and Cohasset. The assignment is politics. Frank meets with a group of friends and colleagues and, over coffee, they talk shop. This morning I am meant to introduce myself, to observe, to take notes on these men and their political views, but more importantly, to annotate this fundamental process of democracy: debate.

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Chico City Council Quiz

Hello my fellow Chico-Americans! For the first time in the history of the Synthesis, we held a City Council Candidate Forum in our hallowed halls. Take our quiz to find out with who you most agree!

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It’s Like My Dad Always Said, “To Make An Omelette, You Have To Raise A Few Chickens. And Then You Have To Slaughter Those Chickens-Yes, Son, That’s Blood. Please Stop Crying. Do You Want To Eat Or Not?”

“I’m afraid I can’t let you into Canada, Sean.” I had been mentally toiling under the certainty of hearing these […]

Freedom Isn’t Free

So what happened?

Last Call

It is with an overall sense of profound appreciation that I write these words. Thank you to everyone who’s ever walked through my door and every advertiser who wrote a check to help support this dream.

The Vine: Once a Synner…

by Max Sidman | I stared at the words on the screen for a minute before I could reply, a thousand thoughts and memories rushing through my mind during that hesitation.

Top 5 Synthesis Accomplishments

by Maurice Spencer Teilmann | Here’s the straight poop on five of my favorite/most memorable/most cringe-worthy things I did during my nine years writing and editing at Synthesis

Al Green: Still Wants To Get Next To You

by Jake Sprecher • Originally Published Sept. 2007 | Sing your love and happiness; sing all of it.

Farewell and Adieu to You Fair Spanish Ladies

And I got to say FUCK a lot.

Spew-o-Matic: The Legend of Esplanada

Every day she would walk up and down the Esplanade

The Hall of the Gods

Best Cover Feature: Ganga Giri

404 Not Found

Print is fucking dead. The written word and human experience are alive and well.

I Lift the Weights so Gently, They Never Know How Strong I’m Getting

I like-like you guys.

Slavery Still Exists

While we are celebrating our freedom from slavery, I would like to take a few moments to remember the people still trapped in slavery’s clutches

We Get What We Give (And What We Deserve)

If we don’t appreciate this totally fantastic human diversity, these strange unexplored corners, they don’t exist for us, our worlds are smaller, and we are less for it. And then, one day, they’re gone.

Communication

As a child, I could spend all day knocking around the neighborhood, maybe going home to eat, maybe not, but my family didn’t hear from me for hours on end, which was fine with me. Now such a thing is unthinkable.

So You’ve Lost a Newspaper Column

Let’s start from the beginning: how the fuck did I get a column? Where am I? Why does it hurt to breathe? All good questions.