When you are at the mercy of the public school system, having to endure terrible teachers is inevitable. This semester I had the misfortune of enrolling in a class being taught by the absolute worst teacher I’ve ever had (so far).

Never have I experienced an individual who so clearly has no desire to teach whatsoever, and has zero interest in actually imparting wisdom of any kind. This is a man who has cancelled nearly half the classes this semester (often with no notice), and when he did show up, we usually just watched a video of some kind. We have had one test, which was administered over a month ago, and has yet to be graded or returned to us. Every post on our course website, PowerPoint presentation, and even the one test we took has been riddled with spelling, grammatical, and syntax errors, leading me to firmly believe that he must compose these masterpieces by ingesting a bottle of booze and mashing the keyboards with his elbows. (He once spelled “success” thusly: suc3ess.)

I imagine that if I were younger, the idea of rarely having to attend class would be incredibly appealing. However, now that I’m closer to 30 than 25, and the costs of school are crazy-stupid high, my ideal outcome for a day at school is to actually learn something. Weird, right?

Anyway, in news that makes me regret my university choice, Geekologie has reported that a Canadian University is offering a course titled Science of Batman. According to the website of University of Victoria in British Columbia, the Science of Batman course explores “the extreme range of adaptability of the human body explored through the life of the Caped Crusader; examines human potential using Batman as a metaphor for the ultimate in human conditioning; evaluates the concepts of adaptation to exercise and injury from the perspective of science and exercise training; examines the multiple sciences behind exercise adaptation; musculoskeletal injury and concussion, and limitations of the human body and mind.” Guys, let’s all move to British Columbia. Everything will be Batman and nothing will hurt.

Now, in why-is-every-country-cooler-than-ours news, apparently there’s a Robot Murder Center opening at Cambridge University…Okay, it’s actually called the Centre For The Study Of Existential Risk, but doesn’t Robot Murder Center sound way catchier? According to their website, the purpose will be to “study the four greatest threats to the human species—artificial intelligence, climate change, nuclear war, and rogue biotechnology.”

Man…get it together, America. You’re seriously lagging. Other countries have Batman courses and Robot Centers, and we’re just stuck listening to crackpots wax paranoid about the Boston Marathon bombings and marveling at the ever-broadening state of Kim Kardashian’s ass.

Zooey Mae has been working as a writer monkey for Synthesis Weekly since 2007. Her favorite things include (but are not limited to), Jeffrey Brown, bubble wrap, Craig Thompson, pillow forts, receiving handwritten letters, and whiskey. She spends her free time stockpiling supplies for the impending robot Apocalypse and avoiding eye contact with strangers.