Archive | Off My Lawn! RSS feed for this section

Observing National Nut Day

ted-cruz2

Tomorrow, October 22, is National Nut Day, making this a perfect moment to share this Open Letter to Black Folks from Their Friends at the Tea Party

Read More Comments

A Truly LaMalfable Situation

lamafa

We’re getting pretty badly LaMalfa’d up here in this rural corner of California. If you don’t know what it means to be LaMalfa’d, then you may not be from around these parts; you may not be represented in Congress by people like our own Dougie LaMalfa, a none-too-bright wealthy heir to a big rice farm […]

Read More Comments

Unadulterated Bull Manure

Domdmul

Because, alas, I spend a portion of each day on Facebook, taking little retreats from my work as a freelance writer, I have a constantly renewing source of bullshit (refined and unrefined) shared with me by people from all over the place—all of whom are my “friends,” though I’ve only met a few of them […]

Read More Comments

Kid Stuff: Ted Cruz Meets Ted Geisel

GreenEggSample3

Senator Ted Cruz took to the Senate floor to stage a filibuster in a petulant stand against the Affordable Care Act. He spent part of his filibuster time reading from Green Eggs and Ham

Read More Comments

An Even Dozen Signs We’re All Nuts

Beautiful-Squirrel-with-Nut

12. Bradley Manning is in jail; Dick Cheney is not.

Read More Comments

Obama, Diplomacy, and Explaining the Facts of Life to a Kid While Engaged in the Act

winner-piers-morgan

It’s no wonder governments have to conduct so much vital business in secret. The people they govern are just too fucking dumb to know that negotiating calls for concessions

Read More Comments

The Dog Days of Summer

OBAMA_NEW_DOG_32679449

First there were rumors, and then there was irrefutable evidence: Barack Obama hates white dogs. The duly elected leader of all the people (and all their dogs) has made his bigotry clear. There are two First Dogs, and they’re both black. And as the right-thinking thinkers of the right wing have been quick to point […]

Read More Comments

The Pride In Being Somewhere Else

Cat+beret

One of the rituals connected to the profession of teaching is an activity I came to call “competitive tourism.” It happens every fall when teachers come together to vie with one another, bearing tales of summer travel. Many decades ago, a few weeks spent in Europe poking around cathedrals and museums was a quite distinct […]

Read More Comments

With Friends Like Those…

best-little-shop-of-horrors-1986--00-630-75

“My friend, (name withheld), told me about what had happened to her friend, (name withheld).”

Read More Comments

Yummy Mummies, Brush Whores, & Chair Chasers

retro-mom-angry-280x280

Man, I just love language! How elastically it adapts, and how creatively we use it to expand our understanding and to express our burgeoning reality.

Read More Comments

Yo’ Mamma, Bitch!

tumblr_mie0j2ZJbQ1rx4lf6o1_500

Most of that bad badinage is rooted in our discomfort about those parts of our bodies engaged in excretion.

Read More Comments

You Might Be A Moron If…

you_might_be_a_redneck_if__largebw

You might be a moron if…you think the Koch brothers have any interest in the well-being of people like you.

Read More Comments

Dealing With It

sad-dog-2

I thought, “When your dog is in pain, not dealing with it is not an option, man,” and I never again thought of that man without a solid measure of disrespect.

Read More Comments

Things To Believe Until Your Skin Clears Up

Screen Shot 2013-04-19 at 1.20.42 PM

And, if you grow into adulthood shielded from the world, cocooned by enough privilege to spare you exposure to less favored people, you’ll also be spared compassion for others.

Read More Comments

Bullshit Left, Bullshit Right

130402-michelle-shocked

Implicit in those words is a smug moral superiority that puts all of its constructs beyond question or criticism.

Read More Comments