Archive | Letters to Desmond RSS feed for this section

Let’s Talk About Sex…And Cake Farts


That means the white sticky stuff Peter has been shooting out of his wrists all these years is…Oh, god. Poor Aunt May.

Read More Comments



If anyone is wondering, when I die (after being smothered in a giant pile of puppies), I want my ashes to be blown into the unsuspecting eyes of my vanquished enemies.

Read More Comments

I’m Not A Geek, I’m A Unique Weasel

Encino Man Pauly shore

My plan, in the unlikely case that baby fever strikes, is to get a puppy.

Read More Comments

Gorilla Porn Warfare

Bobs gorilla file 1 167

I can’t decide whether this idea is really awesome or really depressing.

Read More Comments

The Adventures of Paul Lucas & Tennyson Ford


And for all you sickies out there presently reading this from your toilet, here’s hoping for a speedy recovery.

Read More Comments

Walking Dead Nerd Rage

The Walking Dead1.1 Days Gone ByBehind The ScenesAndrew Lincoln

With every passing season of AMC’s The Walking Dead, it seems there are always new developments that have message boards aflame with the special caliber of hot, fiery rage that only nerds and sports fans can muster.

Read More Comments


I was always envious of Calvin… and his rocketship underpants.

Read More Comments

Ho Ho No

My cousin once told me she farted into a jar and sent it to her friend as a joke. Disgusting? Yes. Hilarious? Obviously.

Read More Comments

Synonyms For Penis

In the wake of Thanksgiving, finding this gem of a story online made me thankful I don’t have a penis. As if I needed another reason.

Read More Comments

Art + Sex = Sexy Art?

“I bet it’s a good conversation starter with the in-laws. Art!”

Read More Comments

Math Sucks, Because Science

So I guess the real message here is that some people’s brains (mine) are just broken…. And also that math sucks.

Read More Comments

Mickey Mouse Owns the Sarlacc Pit

…Star Wars is something untouchable. It’s on a master list with Back To The Future, Who Framed Roger Rabbit and The Princess Bride of titles that you simply don’t touch.

Read More Comments

The Truth Is Out There


I mean, what would All Hallows Eve be without the requisite female population walking in huddled groups, arms clutched tightly to their chests in an attempt to raise their core temperature, and enough synthetic material between every five of them to make maybe one full outfit. Maybe.

Read More Comments

The Lesser Of Two Liars

Let me just say right off the bat, I’m for Obama.

Read More Comments